To see through other's eyes

We are all motivated by something in our life. Some are motivated by money, some by a sense of purpose, some by learning environment, some by cool environment, some need challenging environments so on… Nothing works for all. Something works for all. Everybody has a dominant need, which helps changing as they keep growing. In that sense we are all the same and we are all different. The key is to take other person’s perspective into consideration. Unless you see the world the way others sees it, you cannot empower the world to see it the way you see it.

Leadership is in the ability to step into other’s shoes and then empowering them to walk in the direction that is right for them and that is good for all. There is no one way for all the people. Leadership has to be customized because the persons in your team are different. Different in terms of skills, competence, background, aspirations etc.

People relate to you not for what you are with them, but for what they can be when they are with you. Deep relationships are not built by making you understand me but giving you the confidence that I have understood you.

Even with your children, they find you interesting only if you talk to them about what they are interested in. Once they develop interest in parental company, then you can empower them.

The secret is – To See through the other’s eyes.

Seek first to understand, then to be understood – Stephen Covey

Have a wonderful day! Be Happy. In Happiness lies our prosperity.

S.SEKAR

Contact: sekrajc@yahoo.com

THE ULTIMATE WINNER

In today’s fast moving world we can come across many successful people in their life who possess excellent interpersonal relationship skills. We also come across a wide cross section of people who have been at the top of the pyramid in their academic pursuits but vice versa in their professional life. The reason is that they all lack what is known as soft skills and Interpersonal skills.

The so called interpersonal skills are innate and come from within right from child birth. Of course parental guidance and their beliefs can influence a child in its formative years up to the age of five. Beyond this age the child carries its own in-built system that it has developed and carries it till death. On the other hand, with a great effort put in by an individual one can develop soft skills such as oral and written communication. There is an adage in Tamil language that says what you cannot develop when you are Five years cannot be developed when you are Fifty.

We will try to unfold what makes a winner tick by making a study of different people that we come across in our daily life. Is it the Educational qualifications and the knowledge developed through the years or the added interpersonal relationship skill which is the winning factor? 

Gone are the days when subject knowledge was given the maximum weightage by the interviewers. In today’s context people of the interview panel look for your interpersonal skills and soft skills (Which are given the maximum marks) in addition to your subject and general knowledge.

On a close review, we can come to a conclusion that the ultimate winning factor is your soft skill and interpersonal relationship that you maintain with others in the society as a whole.

If you realize that something is lacking in you, please take immediate action and develop the required skills in order to achieve Success. I can suggest that this can be developed by constant practice and by way of Auto suggestion. Practice makes a man tend to perfection.   

Be blissful.

S.SEKAR

Contact: sekrajc@yahoo.com

Great Thought-Success

Yesterday’s success does not deserve today’s applause. Today is a new day, and it deserves fresh success. In the journey of success, every finishing line is the new starting line. In your career, year after year, you have to prove once again. You have got to challenge yourself once again.

After every accomplishment, the heartbeat of success remains –

• What next?
• What else?
• What More?
• How else?

Success should feed your sense of responsibility and not your ego. Awards and rewards are mere milestones. They are not the destination. So many people in the world have perished unable to handle success. At best, success is a huge source of motivation and we need limit to that at best.

For a student being promoted in 4th standard or even coming first in the class in 4th standard means nothing in 5th. You have to reinvest your efforts once again. Once you step down from the winning podium, you are only a defending champion. The result of previous game gives you no advantage in the next game.

For example – it doesn’t matter how my previous writings or sharing over the last 4 years have been; this writing that you are reading now will be judged afresh.

Stop looking back. Start looking ahead. Raise the bar continuously. Set a new challenge for yourself. “Where to where “does not matter. “ From here to where” alone matters.

Keep going and keep accomplishing.

Keep growing and going up

Wishing you most & more

Have a wonderful day & great week

Be Blissful

S.SEKAR

Contact: sekrajc@yahoo.com

THREE WAYS OF REALISING TRUTH

There are three ways of realising truth that manifests in the world. Creation, Maintenance and destruction. These three are necessary processes in the world. The three gods who represents the processes are Brahma, Vishnu and Maheswara. They come in one form, which is lord Dhatrathtreya. There can never be a creation without destruction. There has to be maintenance. At one time, you will be a child. Your childhood is gone after some time. Your body decays and dies. Again, you are born as a child. Then again, you reach old age. This cycle continues. This is creation and destruction.

What happens in a day?

Morning is born and night is dead. Morning dies and evening is born. Evening dies and night is born. Day is maintained. Same thing happens in a year. Seasons come throughout the year. Year is maintained. Creation and destruction is a part and parcel of the world. You are the expression of creation and destruction. In chapter XI the theme is the cosmic form. What we see in this world is truth and truth alone. But we are not able to see the truth. We pray in temple, while performing rituals we remember the lord. To see lord in every aspect of life is not happening. What you are seeing is not the truth. Sankara says nithya anithya vishesha vichara. One who is able to see real from unreal, eternal from ephemeral has the knowledge.

How firm is your understanding about yourself?

You know 3 equipments. You believe you are the body (Physical body). The definition of Truth is that which persists and that which is constant, which exists as the same in the past, in the present and the future. This is the definition of truth.

What do you know of yourself?

You say this is me by showing your physical body. Body of the child has changed to youth, old age, decay etc. I have got my mind and feelings. Something inside is me for my feelings and thoughts. There are also changes as a child, youth, old age etc. Every aspect of anything you know in this world is not permanent. If you suspect it, you become a philosopher. One moment you are happy and another moment you are unhappy. This is your experience. If you only focus on this aspect, you will gain knowledge. Human is different from nature because human has one thing which no other creature has; to think, understand and the realization of what your life is i.e. mission of life. To discover who you are Viz. not the body, not the mind and to discover the truth we have to do our duties and obligations. Name, fame stays behind. It will not accompany you. You can take with you only the knowledge or ignorance. If you come to know the truth, you are happy and composed. Otherwise you always complaint.

You are engaged in life in many things. Even the greatest achievement in this world is insignificant. Whatever you achieve in your dream is not permanent. What value your money has when you wake up. You have got to live your life. Suppose you have a dream. Once you wake up your dream is gone.

If you understand and fulfill your life and discover who you are and what is it that you must achieve? It must hit you all the time. If you do it realise it and throw your opportunity called life it is a loss for you. We are enjoying the bliss of ignorance. You have got to help yourself by yourself. The only reason that you have born a human being irrespective of caste, colour, and religion is to discover who you are. Every chapter of Bhagavad Gita is trying to tell that. In chapter XI the Cosmic form is to visualize the totality. This cosmic form “Viswarupa” is visualization of truth.

Brahma, Vishnu and Shiva represent balance in this world by way of Creation, Maintenance and Destruction.

Humans who are below average are unconscious victims of life. Average human is afraid of Birth, growth, old age, decay. He does not want this to happen to him. Death occurring is a promotion. Death is a resultant force. You entertain every moment desires and desires. When your physical body and the environment are not suitable for the exhaustion of your desires it chooses another body for exhaustion of your Vasanas and desires. This is the law of Causation. This explains the phenomenon of birth and death. Every cause has an effect and every effect has a cause. We must remember this.

A young body dies in an accident. There is no such thing as accident. Everything is because the Vasanas has decided to move. It is called the resultant force. There is a perfect explanation for death. An average person doesn’t understand that. An above average person who has a high knowledge knows that everything is happening as required by the law of nature.            

   

People are enthusiastic when they want to take a spiritual path. First, you have to take the initial step. Take care of your body the vehicle which you have to use right through your life. Instead, you live on medicines and injections.

In Upanishads, which discusses transactions between a Guru and Sishya, says may you live for 100 years. You must be able to stand until the rest of your life. You must be beneficial to others, you are peaceful and energetic. Let us live a full life, healthy life and a joyous life, which is worth living. You have got to work towards living a proper life. Start from where you are and build your understanding in what you are interested.

Creation, maintenance and destruction are the 3 parts of expression in this world. Death is worship. Birth is worship. They are expression of reality and we respect it.

Whatever we are facing in life right or wrong is due to cause and effect relationship. Whatever actions you performed this day backward (your feelings, your thoughts); your future is a continuation of the past but modified with present. If you want to be happy in the future, you better correct yourself now so that your future is changed. Otherwise, you will be agitated throughout your life. What you would like to do is correct your actions and your feelings. Everything in life is based on cause and effect theory. Your future depends on what you do this day onwards by your own actions, your own feelings and your own thoughts.

The entire creation has come from Brahman sustained in Brahman and go back to Brahman. Punarabi Jananam Punarabi Maranam, the cycle of birth and death you have to go through and until you reach the original state, you will be pressurized. You will continue to have pressures in life until you set the direction to find the truth. The death of the body, death of the ego will give you spiritual enlightenment. It depends on what is your constant effort to seek the truth.

Our natural way of life is spiritual. It is where your thoughts are. You have to think of the higher and find the truth. You get what you deserve and not what you desire. This is the law of Karma.

Law of causation tells us about the theory of reincarnation. Every cause has an effect. You cannot prove birth and death. Theory of reincarnation is proposed based on the law of causation. Sudden gain of property is the effect. The cause is your pre action. This is the theory of reincarnation. The whole thing is based on cause and effect theory.

Be blissful.

S.Sekar

Contact: sekrajc@yahoo.com

CAUSE AND EFFECT; THEORY OF REINCARNATION

The whole world functions on the law of cause and effect. In fact, each one’s life is based on cause and effect. If you know this, you can know how things function in your life. Any effect you see has a cause and vice versa. Whatever you express within yourself or you see in this world is based on this law. Theory of reincarnation is based on this law.

Do you believe in reincarnation?

Even though a scientific explanation for everything is possible, science cannot prove many things. Nobody can say for sure for eg. Can you believe that the roof will not come down? It is a belief. It is not a blind belief. It is based on certain facts. It is a reputed building and is here for 100 years. It is a belief but not a blind belief. Belief based on certain facts that cannot be proved. Similarly, we can’t tell for sure what this reincarnation is. It is based on certain facts. It is the law that states every cause has an effect and vice versa and based on this the theory of reincarnation is projected.

In the book on Vedanta treatise by Swami Parthasarathy the law of causation is discussed in detail. It has 2 aspects. They are the law of Karma and the law of destiny. Law of Karma says you are whatever you have done in the past and in the present. Law of destiny says you get what you deserve. Don’t blame the stars. Don’t blame the environment. You believe anything that has to do with the world outside. Be aware that nothing in the world can disturb you except your own Self. You are disturbed by your own thoughts, your own actions.

You interpret something in a negative way and feel disturbed. You are answerable to your own conscience and you know it yourself. You must be faithful to your own conscience. If you perform the right type of action, you will get a positive result. If you have any problem in life, you are repaying your own past and your own feelings.      

We are Humans. We can correct anything including ourselves. You can evolve or you can devolve. We can learn to use this opportunity called life and correct ourselves instead of correcting the world.

The following words are said to be written on the tomb of an Anglican bishop in the crypts of Westminster abbey in London, England.

“When I was young and free and my imagination had no limits, I dreamed of changing the world. As I grew older and wiser, I discovered the world would not change –

So I shortened my sights somewhat and decided to change only my country, but it too seemed immovable.

As I grew into my twilight years, in one last desperate attempt, I settled for changing only my family, those closest to me, but alas, they would have none of it.

And now I realise as I lie on my death bed, If I had only changed myself first, then by example I would have changed my family. From their inspiration and encouragement, I would then have been able to better my country,

And who knows, I might have even changed the world”.  

All starts with yourself and ends with yourself. You correct yourself the world will stand corrected. The moment you purify / develop yourself others will also change. Perform your bounded duty and keep doing what you ought to do in your life. That is the teaching Krishna gives Arjuna in Chapter XI of Bhagavad Gita.  

Let us be the factor of change. Change yourself first, and see the change in the world around you thereafter. Start with yourself and you can find your life peaceful and joyful. It is difficult to change but not impossible. Every human being can make a life for himself.

The moment we are faced with a personal problem, we collapse. This is because we have Knowledge but no Wisdom. Anybody can gain knowledge by reading a book. You will not benefit by reading books. Wisdom helps you to discriminate and to use your intellect as well. You can reflect upon the knowledge acquired by you and think about it over and over again until it becomes a part of you by way of Shreddha. Faith is a belief in a thing that you do not know until you come to know what you believe in. Shreddha is the ability to take something and you pursue it until you understand what is said and assimilate it until you go to the end of something. We do this act with respect to food. We enjoy our food until it digests and until it becomes part of it. We eat more and more of food. You will not let go until it gets digested. Intake of food gives us physical strength. Thought when assimilated is our mental strength. The moot point is that the knowledge you acquire should be converted into Wisdom.

Wake up in the morning by 4 AM and generate positive thoughts in you by studying the scriptures. By the time, you finish the day you accumulate all negative thoughts. The eternal truth Sanatana Dharma should be read. Understand and reflect it over and over again, put it into use and convert it into wisdom.

Everything in this world is impermanent. You should be successful when you do what you ought to do. Young people are ready to group their ideas early in life. Therefore, it is better to learn when you are young. Learn to do what you ought to do, moment to moment. To be able to concentrate when you want the mind to stay is difficult. However learning early in life what you ought to do is perfection. Everybody ought to help himself or herself.  

Animals don’t have a problem because they do not have an intellect. Humans have a choice to use their intellect and save themselves from a problem. When the mind is not geared, you do action without your knowledge and regret later. Develop your intellect just as you go to a gym and make your body strong by way of exercise. Similarly, if you exercise your intellect it will become strong and hold the mind in place.

Arjuna after seeing the Vishwarupa of the Lord understands that he has to surrender. When you go to a doctor, you have to surrender. Wherever you do not know (about a subject), you need to surrender and seek the grace of Bagawan. When you surrender, you get help and support. Arjuna has reached a stage where he understands his experience as beyond his understanding and seeks lord Krishna’s support.

Be Blissful.

S.Sekar

Contact: sekrajc@yahoo.com

ENVIRONMENT

Beauty of Nature and Environment - Please Protect Both

Today is Environment day (5th June 2015). Hence I chose to write on this.

When we talk about environment, we are actually talking about our surroundings. This includes both living and non-living things. Environment is generally of two types

1.    Natural

2.    Built in

A natural environment is one that has an existence that is natural. On the other hand, a built in environment is one that has come into existence because of man, as man is responsible for its creation.  While natural environment includes forests, mountains, water etc, a built in environment would be cities, dams and more.

It is a sad truth that our beautiful environment is getting more and more polluted. The pollution is mostly due to unnatural causes. Pollution is also caused by natural factors like Volcanoes; however, natural pollution is not as rampant as man made one. It is man’s reckless and uncaring behaviour that is the prime reason for the dismal state of our environment. Humans are generally a self-centred race whose bad habits have led to the degradation and destruction of our environment. The reasons for which our eco system is being destroyed are many and varied.

Man’s hunger for material wealth leads to deforestation, pollution, land degradation and the last but not the least, Global warming. These environmental hazards are responsible for the poor condition of Mother Earth. The felling of trees in a reckless manner has led to land erosion and scanty rainfall.

Pollution of Nature is of two types Viz, Air and Water pollution. Smoke from factories, fuel emission are the primary causes for air pollution. Chemical wastes from factories dumped into rivers and seas leads to water pollution.

Finally, we arrive at the contemporary concern of all environmentalists, which is causing a lot of anxiety, viz Global Warming. Global warming has been defined as the rise in the Earth’s average temperature beside the surface air and ocean.

 A massive amount of heat has been trapped on our planet caused by the detrimental effect of green house gases. These gases get trapped inside the rays of the Sun and lead to global warming.  The effects of these hazards are corroding our precious environment. Population explosion and economic advancement are also factors that have led to increased level of pollution.

It is thus important to remember that all things, both living as well as non-living are affected by pollution. We all need to realise that we have only one environment, which should be shared and taken care of in the best way possible.

We are disturbing the ecology and creating ecological imbalance. This is not good for our well-being. Let us strive to maintain ecological balance by way of afforestation and protect both nature and our environment. Pollution abatement should be our motto. Recycling of wastewater, Flaring of waste gases and conservation of energy will help us go a long way into creating a cleaner environment. Let us change our attitude, work together for ecological balance, and protect our forests, which the nature has given us.

S.SEKAR

Contact: sekrajc@yahoo.com

TRAITS OF A GNANI

A Gnani knows that the world has no power to disturb him. He alone empowers the world to disturb him. A Gnani is one who does not disturb the world nor does he disturb others. A Gnani accepts the Raga Dvesha of others. He is not a threat to anyone. His mind is free from emotional problem.

Anything will become a burden if I am very particular about the results of my action. A Gnani accepts the result of his actions with equanimity. You can move with people but avoid emotional dependence on the world. Dependence is sorrow. Independence is Happiness. We have to depend on things and people but learn to manage them. Efficiency increases naturally when the mind is calm. A turbulent mind is a block for all our resources. A calm mind can take a right decision. Any decision involves a risk (wild risk or a calculated risk). Prepare your mind and say ‘I am ready for any result’. This resolve will make me face any situation with ease. Say to yourself that ‘I am ready for any karmapalan’. This will reduce my anxiety. A hundred percent free mind is impossible. Any emotion is a thought. Any thought can continue in my mind only if I permit. I train my mind to divert unhealthy thoughts that comes. Therefore, a mantrajapa is very useful when my mind goes haywire and restless. Then the mind will calm down.

A Gnani practices samatvam or equanimity. Life is a continuous confrontation of pairs of opposites Viz., Heath, ill health, which are continuous opposite experiences. We have to train our mind to remain equanimous. Reaction can make the situation worse. It will increase the pain caused by the situation. If I leave it, the impact of the pain will be lesser and lesser. Remove the emotional content from the pain. Then there remains only biological pain and it will come down. Acceptance will quieten the mind. Stress is emotional disturbance only. Stress reduces our immunity. Many diseases are already inside our body and immunity is keeping them under control. These diseases will flare up due to stress and due to loss of immunity. For maintaining good physical health, our mind should be free from emotional disturbances. This also helps in keeping mental health and harmony. They are useful in maintaining intellectual health also. Bhagavad Gita helps in keeping spiritual health, which is the primary purpose of Bhagavad Gita. We will have mental refinement, which will help in absorbing Vedantic teaching.

Absorption, retention and assimilation of knowledge give unique joy, peace and fulfillment at the mental level, which is called Jivan Mukthi. Therefore, knowledge represents the value wherever he (Gnani) gets an opportunity (ver13 to ver20 of 12 Ch BG). There is a saying “When the going gets tough the tough gets going”. The one who is mentally strong and who mentally enjoys endurance, that person alone can maintain equanimity and emotional immunity (he is a Gnani).

Every painful situation is an opportunity for increasing emotional immunity. Never nourish Raga Dvesha. Remember that nobody will be with us all the time. Therefore, my mind should be ready for a losing situation also. A mind, which is prepared to lose the losable, is the mind of a Sanyasi. In life, every pleasant thing is losable including our own health. One who is not prepared to lose the losable is insane. According to Vedanta, a Gnani does not depend on things, people and situations.

A wet clay Ball will stick to the ground and will not rise up. A rubber Ball when falling on the ground will bounce back. A sound mind will bounce back even after a tragic disturbance, after a mourning period. Living in the past, losing the present and future is an unintelligent way of life. The toughest discipline is speech control. More dependence is not progress. Less dependence is a progress. That is called internal progress. You have to become independent and not depend on anybody. A spiritual person (Gnani) will remain calm in spite of different set of conditions around him including food. Liberation is never possible without spiritual wisdom.

A spiritually ignorant person will say, I am a small individual struggling to survive in this vast universe. Vedanta says that the whole universe including the body and mind and the Galaxy are all a spec in me who is infinite Consciousness. Me referred here is ‘I’ the chaitanya tatvam. I am a spec in the world is “Samsara”. Life is a burden for a Samsari. Life is a blessing for a Sanyasi. The aim of Vedanta is making the vision meaningful. I am an ocean and all galaxies are like bubbles is the Vedantic vision. Adi Sankaracharya refers to this in his famous Viveka Chudamani (when the body falls for a Gnani).

How does a tree look at the event when its leaves fall? Tree will remain and the leaves fall one by one. Everybody is a leaf in a tree called ‘Brahman’, which is infinite and everlasting. You can use the world as the stepping-stone but hold on to God for stability, peace and Happiness. For a spiritual seeker, World is the means and God is the end.

Be Blissful.

S.Sekar

Contact: sekrajc@yahoo.com